There’s a couch in the front of the church that Darco and I attend. It’s grey, themed with the carpet and accented by the red chairs.
Darco is teaching Sunday School, 5 year olds to be precise, the atrium is filled with football scores and school scandals…some things just can’t be ignored.
I am an alien, a foreigner to this place. I do not exist in this realm, spinning webs of a world that I do not partake in. It’s about contests and competitions, winning, losing, and finding truth between the lies. As the sojourner I merely observe, finding struggles of integration. Perhaps I’m in need of rehabilitation, finding ways to operate within this space.
Instead, it only takes one, two individuals to speak with a forced sense of communication for me to relocate back to reality. Listening to their fears, concerns, and their heart reminds me that I’m human after all.
Spoke with the principal at the school I’ve been at for three weeks today.
Basically, my life looks something like this…
I practically have a job opening, once my certification is reactivated.
I’m going to need to take a 2-3 course, one found via Univ. Of Phoenix (six week course).
After completion I’ll need to take my middle school certification exam via the department of education of our state.
Afterwards I’ll be up-to-date on certification (and will have taken my first graduate course). My objective, and prayer, figure out how to achieve this all by January 1, 2015.
I’ve been in the teacher’s shoes now. Being sick (cold), and still needing to be in class. I’m on my third week of class at a local middle school. I’ve been running off a diet of Day-Quil with a side of Ny-Quil. It’s working, but by night time I’m spent (I’m falling asleep while typing this).
Friday is my last day in my current position (unless told otherwise). I’m already becoming sad at the notion of having to move on, and back to bouncing around as a sub.
Free time: Making selfie signs...
Sure, some folks say, “Be prepared to stay”, but sadly…I’m not really a qualified teacher, at all. There’s no real reason why a district would want to keep me versus starving post-college educators that are desperate. Just my two cents. It makes me sad. I love what I’m doing, but the truth is what I offer isn’t necessarily enough. Yes, I pray that a miracle occurs, but I also fight to keep my heart safe. When it comes to employment I’m tired of not being good enough.
You know what sounds ideal? I’ll paint you a picture (Facebook quizzes said I’m good at that):
Waking up in the outskirts of the city. Brewing coffee, blending up breakfast, taking a shower and hitting the road.
Arriving at work 10-15 minutes later (versus the past year of +100 miles per day) and turning on the lights to my classroom.
After school is out, heading home, unpacking the day, grabbing a snack and either hitting the track or the local gym. Killing it for a few hours, gearing up for the next race, and afterwards heading home to recover. Dinner with health benefits (aka not garbage), a quiet evening with Darco, if we didn’t have plans that night, and heading to bed at a moderate time.
May not seem like much, but after three years of chaos…it’d actually be kind of nice.
As you’re all aware of by now, Darco has been promoted within Starbucks (which causes sixth grade children to ask me for free coffee drinks on a daily basis). This is the first time in her life that she’s going from hourly to salary in the form of wages. Obviously, we’re both very excited.
However, like all good businesses there is a slight hitch with this good news. Paychecks. Due to the time of her official promotion her actual ‘real’ paycheck was pushed back a full pay period. We knew this, and it came right at the time that we knew we’d hit the pinch between my pay of my old job and my current job. It was the perfect storm by way of finances, something that we’re still learning to weather in this life.
If you factor that in with how my recent paychecks have worked out in recent weeks, it really only takes one stupid screw-up to throw an entire budget off pace. We’ve had around a dozen in the past two weeks.
The point to this story? This Friday Darco will receive her very first paycheck for her promotion. I will be able to move my payment process for my job over to electronic deposit, meaning I’ll be paid on time. After handling a brutal past month financially, we’ll be back on track. The really cool part? Between my current position (praying for positive change soon) and Darco’s new position, as a unit we’ll be bringing in the same amount of money monthly as we were before my prior job ended. Personally, I just see that as a nice way of God guiding us down the right path.
We still have the survive this remaining week, but praise God there is a very vivid light at the end of this tunnel.
Friday is a good day. It signals the end of the week, and after this week I have no complaints about. I was able to view life through “teacher spectacles” by attending meetings, working on class projects, and even entering final grades for the quarter (done today). In return I’ve received a school computer, grade book access, key to the room, and Monday I’ll have an ID badge ready for me in the morning.
Still rocking it as a substitute. It gets harder with each day that passes in the school. Redirecting questions, being honest, and staying focused on the classroom. Trust me, it isn’t easy, and I’m not even close to a real teacher. More instructors are pushing me towards the standardized test for middle school education (November), just emphasizing to be timely.
It’s pressure. It’s new. I love it, but I’m equal amounts terrified.