XXXI: Focus


Amazing what random thoughts transpire over a steak at dinner…

While finishing up the weekend with Darco, we were enjoying dinner this evening and I was in mid-monologue about something that really struck me as unique; the inability to focus on the task at hand, and if it is temptation deviating from the overall goal?

Let me explain:
While at church this morning I thought up a fun t-shirt (in my warped world). It was rather simple, all black with white font that read My Bass Drop Is My Worship. It was a thought that tended to go against the current trend of acoustic/rock gospel music that runs through the airwaves today. Personally, I just think a crazy bass drop inside a ‘worship chorus’ would be absolutely face-melting awesome. It was something that caught my attention this morning. That turned into a clothing brand idea, which turned into a brand name, which turned into a business plan. Quite seriously that was my early afternoon while enjoying the World Cup final at Rock & Run Brewery.

With that random thought in mind, I shared it with Darco at dinner and while sharing it with her it dawned on me…

My objective is to train. My objective is to run.

I’ll gladly confess to having problems of finding five million projects to work on at once, it’s part of the curse of working with social media. You learn to ingest and create new content 24/7. That’s the expectation of the job. However, if left unchecked it can also dramatically affect your personal life also (food for thought). It was around the time that our food came out that I looked and Darco and simply said, “I think it’s temptation. There are so many things that I could be doing, but for now I have to focus. I’m to focus on training, I’m to focus on running.” The rest of life (work, family, church, etc…) moves on without a hitch, but outside of that I’ve made the specific commitment to focus on running for the next two years. Not only as a form of life, but also as growing closer in the form of my worship to my God.

Perhaps that’s another element of “XXXI”, learning to focus on what the priorities are and learning how to follow through with the commitments that you make. One of my biggest regrets/disappointments with the Kansas City Shock was knowing how many people I let down because I didn’t follow through with my word. Practically speaking I lied; I lied to people involved, fans, family, and even myself. My prayer is that “XXXI”, in a strange way, can be a form of redemption and forgiveness for the past failures and transgressions that still feel recent.

Maybe someday that shirt will be made, and maybe a new adventure will come along the horizon. For now though, I eat the food I’m supposed to eat, I lift the weights I’m supposed to lift, and I train, and I train, and I train. Each moment that the sweat is pouring, I’m praying; each moment the breathing is heavy, I’m praising.

I want my focus to be on the personal ability to demonstrate my worship to my Father.

-D-

Mobile Minutes: Debt Free


The title of this post should terrify you.

Darco and I were in the apartment this morning, plotting out our world domination [per usual], and we started speaking about her opportunity for promotion with Starbucks this month.

That’s when we took a break, and started crunching some ‘hypothetical’ numbers. We factored in my monthly pay, and her adjusted pay with her new pay salary when she promotes [trust me, she's going to promote]. That’s when we sat in the bedroom, nearly startled at our discovery.

If…

Darco gets promoted, and I maintain the position I currently have with the investment firm in Kansas City; we could actually be…in theory…

100% debt free by Christmas of 2015

Some of you know of my college debt, and there has been some theme of it throughout this site. Darco and I, myself nearly shaking, just kept going over the numbers and realizing. It’s possible. After a decade of personal debt, there is a potential light at the end of the tunnel. When you’ve dealt with such high debt for so long you tend to just acknowledge that it’s something you’re just going to ‘deal with’ for the rest of your life; like a house mortgage.

What if that wasn’t the case?

Sure, it does revolve around a giant if but…can you just wrap your head around that concept?

-D-

Mobile Minutes: Bigger


Sitting at GCC (Grace Community Church), listening to the pastor talk about Faith-Giving. He’s hanging out in Hebrews for the day.

The primary focal point that I’m getting out of it is the simple question:

How much faith do you really have? Do you really believe what you proclaim you believe.

Unlike last night, things in the family are amazing. Job, car, wife, etc…I would hope that through humility it would demonstrate God’s timing, and His grace.

With that being said, there are things in life that are still bigger then I know what to do with. Naturally, the Kansas City Shock comes to mind. It’s so big, just churning like a storm cloud miles away on a drought stricken plain. You know it’s there, and you know eventually it’s going to pour, and you’re just holding on, hoping, praying, knowing, and just wondering how long you can hold out. Can you make it to the rain?

That image is directly the Shock, you know it’s there, you know it’s coming, and you’re holding on, trying to make it.

How do you make it? How do you survive? Easy.

You don’t, by yourself. You can’t make it on your own.

Instead of getting stuck on what is, what so many deem as “reality”, get wrapped up in dreaming. Dreaming isn’t a waste of time, as so many will comment, it’s demonstrating that your arrogance of the unknown lies directly with God.

Only He can make it rain.

-D-

Mobile Minutes: Thought Provoking


You could say that it is a ‘bad habit’, but I’m typing on my phone during church service.

…break out the Holy Water…

The reality is that Sunday always tends to prove to be an overwhelming reminder of why the Kansas City Shock exists. As it turns out, the ‘magic’ that conjures up for the Shock, 90% comes during church. In an absolute comfort zone, my mind wanders around, mulling over new ideas (hence why I love Google Keep).

The truth is, it’s a beautiful mixture. Blending a passion with a calling, in a sanctuary of encouragement. My business world combines with my spiritual existence, and it is only in that split second that I’m at complete peace.

-D-

Mobile Minutes: Never Ending


Darco and I finally got an amazing nights rest last night, after a wonderful date night.

We took Saturday night off from the world and checked out our friends brewery being built in Kansas City, enjoyed some incredible pizza at Leo’s, and enjoyed Cloudy With A Chance Of Meatballs 2. It was a great evening.

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This morning started all over. We got our free coffee at Dunkin Donuts for National Coffee Day and headed to MoVal.

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MoVal was my sanctuary since I’ve returned to this area a few years ago. I wasn’t welcomed at my home church and moved on. At MoVal I witnessed Darco get baptized, many, many good meals, became a member of the church, and was recently married in this tiny little building.

MoVal is no longer safe.

There has been sickness, injury, death, sorrow, grief, sadness, and more just in the past two weeks. Unfortunately it involves very delicate topics. It’s put me in an unfamiliar position. My priority is God first, family second. I have to protect my wife, and see what God wants for us. Currently, I’m just not sure what to do.

It makes me angry, in a humbling way, that there really is no safe zone in this world. Spiritually, our sanctuary isn’t in a physical form, but it’s still rough knowing that in the world we’re always on the run.

-D-