Yes, I can see clearly now is being played on the main stage. I haven’t moved since first arriving. Incredibly for July it is below seventy degrees already. Rather strange. It wasn’t until I was sitting here for so long did I realize how constant life has been. I mean…I’m getting married in six days…what? I hadn’t even given time to really comprehend that.
Even during premarital counseling out pastor made it clear that his primary area for concern is myself getting lost in work.
As I explained, painfully, to Darco last week. I’m doing a million projects right now, but the income from any of them isn’t there. Is it considered work if there isn’t financial compensation? Is the Kansas City Shock work? I don’t know. I’m fearful that someone, primarily Darco, will look at me and state that since I don’t work for money, I’m not really working. It’s a hard concept to grasp. I keep telling myself that I need to work hard to prove that I can work, and that I am working.
That was a side track…
The musician just fired up Michael Jackson, so the tempo has changed a bit. However, the reality stays the same. I wish I could do this every night. I wish I had a place to go, music to hear, and just unwind. It isn’t even about meeting people. It’s just about getting away from everything that consumes me (minus family of course).
I suppose I’m still trying to figure out how people permit themselves to relax without feeling guilt.