Strange sensation coming in the next twenty-four hours.
I’ll be alone for an entire week.
That means no wife for an entire week.
You want to talk about being scared?
Because of school obligations next week I had to humbly bow out of an opportunity to go with a mission team to the country of El Salvador for the week. However, potentially the most shocking thing witness for the year to date, was watching my wife step up and state that she’d like to go to El Salvador in my place.
You know those days where your head is so congested that every time you stand you get a taste of what vertigo is all about?
This random cold, probably obtained through exhaustion, has kept me seated most of the day. I’ve gotten up long enough to get coffee, prepare dinner, and move some dirty clothes around. That’s about it. My day has been ended, so I’ve spent the remainder of it on the couch working on messages and emails from the previous week.
Those were the words pacing through my brain as the paved lanes passed before me heading back into the comforts of my home last night. As stated in earlier messages during the recent mission trip, I had high hopes of rekindling my love with the thing that hurt the most in spiritual warfare, damage, etc…being mission minded and having fun. Continue reading →
It’s not even 6:00AM on Friday morning, and I’m staring at the ceiling. Like all good things, this trip is drawing to an end.
Last night was one of the more humorous events of the entire week. Armed with a snow-cone machine and some giant, neon poster boards, we took the crew to the local baseball complex.
Simple. Give away free snow-cones.
Darco, armed with syrup pumps (funny how God uses barista training), started dishing out the cones. The rest of us vanished into the streets and parking lots letting people know about the opportunity (note: growing out the beard has one drawback…a grown man with a beard, telling kids about free snow-cones at a park…borderline creepy).
In total we served up 250 snow-cones, made several new friends through the kids showing up, and were thoroughly blessed by cooler weather and a nice southern breeze. This was a nice change up from the 102℉ we witnessed while throwing mulch on Wednesday. Interesting factoid though, our group was able to successfully disperse all mulch to all playgrounds throughout the school district. With no heat sickness, and no injuries with the pitchforks being used. That’s rather impressive in my book. Personally, I get so much joy doing physical labor as a service. I’m thinking that’s because I’ve been going that route on missions for years.
It’s 6:00AM, time to shower, eat, pack, and hit the road.
Those were the words, three hours in, that I heard being asked in my direction. Heading to far, south Missouri what was my intent? My purpose?
Riding with a member from our house church group, I tried my best to swallow my pride and be honest.
I want to find my love again.
It was the first time to anyone in our group that I had openly spoken about my divorce. It’s this hidden guilt that I don’t want to acknowledge for fear of being rejected, but in the moment of this question it was needed. I spoke of my love for mission work, it’s the one thing within the church that I’ve always enjoyed. Because it was so close to my heart, it’s what took the biggest hit when I became divorced. I was convinced that I was on the disabled list for good. “God can’t use blemishes to do cool stuff like missions…”, I’d mumble to myself.
There's fans! And air conditioning in our dorm!
My personal prayer is that humility during this mission trip, with this close group, can heal…spiritually…in an area that I 100% desire to be back alive. It’s a short, calm, safe trip so the environment is ideal. My hope is that as time progresses I can work up to where I once was.
You just watch, Darco isn’t afraid of international travel.
Internet and data is pretty limited out here in southern Missouri.
Yesterday started the first day of the physical labor for the group. Terra Nova, the church we’re working with, has a great partnership with the local school district. Because of this we have a great opportunity to help out the schools maintenance department by spreading fresh mulch throughout the playgrounds…
…of nine school buildings…
The weather cooperated throughout the morning with our small group (5) at the school. Thankfully, with pitchforks in hand, no impaling took place amongst the youth.
Lunch was unique and incredible. There’s a bakery named “The Knead” in town, it’s managed and owned by the folks of Terra Nova church. With a prison just down the road, The Knead acts as an opportunity ministry to assist released inmates by providing employment baking bread. Our lunch for the week is coming from these awesome folks (and the bread is very good).
The afternoon provided plenty…PLENTY of sunshine and more mulch. The crew held on firm for four hours spreading mulch. Conversations of faith, school, and the Illuminati all took place to keep our brains from frying (DYK: Kanye worked for the Illuminati and attempted to assassinate 2pac)?
The hard work paid off with a trip to Lambert’s in Sikeston, Missouri. The evening was full of thrown rolls, carbs, and sweet, sweet molasses.
I’ve been thinking of new projects, ideas, and adventures in coming months. I think I’m going about it the wrong way. I get these desires to split my identity into multiple directions (running, marketing, writing, music, teaching, missions…), and what I’m watching is the fact that I’m diluting the most powerful branding image…
I don’t need a site for cooking, or a site for running, or a site for writing. I just need to be me. Readers decide if they’re going to understand my thought process all on one page, and it isn’t my responsibility to be apologetic about it, right?
Yes, I can write about marriage, running, and rave parties in the same blog because it all revolves around one element: my unique identity.
I suppose in some instances I’ve lost contact with the internal artist that creates the abstract that is my mind*.
Naturally, that all starts right here at FilingThePapers.com.